UP CLOSE WITH JEANIE by Jeanie Summerville
Click here to read part 2
What’s up babies?
In this thing called life, on our journey of love, the time has come for me to share something of great importance with you: Our Heavenly FATHER’s campaign to comfort the hearts of HIS people, with HIS love, who have the blues due to the death of a loved one, suicide contemplations, HIS children who have been abused and or traumatized and etc., is underway and I’m the overseer. And, HE wants all of you to have a clear understanding of how it came to be because you must first know where I’ve been to know where I’m going. I also need you to know, I’m just a six-foot tall, skinny, black chick who loves GOD and in loving HIM. I love all of you too. And, it’s okay while reading this spotlight, if you say or think, “is she for real?” So, I’ll answer that for you right now, “yes I’m very much for real.” So at this time, just relax while I share with you a segment that happened in my life with GOD and this is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me GOD.
This is my story:
GOD came to me, the first time, at the age of 10 because the time had come for an adult to inform me of something I needed to know. But, it wasn’t what was said that gave me the blues—it was how it was said mean, rude and nasty. With tears running down my face, my heart needed an understanding. So, I looked around at the other adults that were in the room with me, in hope, of that understanding but I didn’t get it. All they did was turn their heads, as if, they didn’t even care that I was hurting inside. And, from their reactions, I knew what was told to me was true and in turn, I was lost. But five minutes later, I wasn’t lost anymore because GOD came to me and gave me an understanding and soothed my blues with love and in the process, HE started preparing me for the other many trials and tribulations that I’m gonna have to go through but HE did tell me, “I got you baby. I got you,” and I believed HIM.
But on Sept. 19, 2002, I didn’t believe HIM anymore and the Jeanie Summerville, that the people once thought they knew, died of a broken heart because it had had enough of the blues givers (the people who take the liberty to give others the blues for their own selfish reasons and or personal gain by any means necessary) For this day was to be a very special day because “Soothin’ the Blues” part one of the Concert Series was to have its first major concert at the Allen County War Memorial Coliseum and I knew that if this concert was a success, some of GOD’s people and myself would have had our blues soothed for at least one night together, in the name of love.
But instead, after returning home from our limousine ride to promote this event for the last time on Sept. 18, 2002, I was contacted via telephone approximately 8 p.m., by a blues giver, to inform me that this concert was not going to take place, unless I involved him and his team and he was a very powerful man—so powerful, that he knew I would succumb to their demands. But, I wasn’t willing only because that would have defeated the concert’s purpose. For that man and his team were some of the same men that were giving me and so many others the blues.
He also informed me that he contacted everybody that was to work the sound and lights for the event, and told them they’d better back out if they didn’t they would be black listed and would never work in the Midwest again. Then he said, “Jeanie, all I have to do is say okay and I’ll make a call and it’s on again.” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing and then I simply said, “no, I’m not willing,” because I thought I would be willing to suffer the consequences of my actions. I didn’t think that GOD would allow such beauty not to take place and give the blues givers that kind of power over Soothin’ the Blues part one, which was actually GOD’s concert, so HE could spend some quality time with all of us there, as a whole.
But in the morning, I found out that the concert was not going to happen and it didn’t happen just like that man said it wouldn’t because no sound, no lights means no concert but I didn’t blame GOD. This situation just made me want to be with HIM then, instead of later and all I could do was cry. But, I did not cry for just myself. I cried for all of the people who had the blues and needed those blues soothed (with love), including GOD. Then I got bored with crying and started to prepare myself to join HIM, even though I knew that committing suicide is a sin. But I didn’t care, for I’d grown tired of the blues givers in HIS world and wasn’t willing to put up with them anymore because they’re everywhere. Remember that song, “Smiling Faces” by Friends of Distinction? Well believe it or not, in a whole lot of situations, those lyrics are true.
But before I took myself out, I knew I had to call our sponsors to inform them the show wasn’t going to happen and why. I think I scared all of them by my message and the tone of my voice, as a matter of fact, I know I did because one of the sponsors raced to my rescue, in hope, of helping me get myself together but it didn’t work. The heartbreak had already happened and there was nothing that he nor any other human being could have said or done to stop me, but he didn‘t know that. So, for his sake, I did calm down a little bit, so he’d think he helped and then I thanked him and sent him on his way. Once that was done, I prepared myself to do it and at that moment, the most spectacular thing happened:
I heard what sounded like hundreds of birds in the tree outside my bedroom window, chirping in unison and it sounded so beautiful. Then I said out loud, I don’t care about those birds singing, I’m going to end it right now! And, once I said those words out loud, a burst of bright light came glistening through my closed window blinds on the right side of me and it stopped at the foot of my bed. I gazed upon the bright light to see what was going to happen because it was forming into a figure. It was then that I knew GOD had come to visit me again. So, I said “hi.” Then HE told me to get up and look out the window and I replied, I don’t care what’s out there in YOUR world, anymore.”
Something happened after I said that and I’m not going to share it because I don’t want to frighten you. But afterwards, I said okay, opened the window blinds and looked out. Just as I suspected, the big tree was filled with all kinds of beautiful birds, in a variety of colors and even though I didn’t want to feel the beauty, I couldn’t help myself because once again, HE took time out of HIS busy schedule to visit with me and that made me feel special so I smiled, then all the birds stopped singing and flew away. Then HE asked me to look to my left and to my right and tell HIM what I saw. I said, “what difference does it make what I see? I don’t care anymore because I’m going to be with you.” He said, “just do it!” So I did. “I saw trees, houses, cars, the street, grass, people talking and laughing as if they’re having fun,” I said. “Is there anything else you’d like to know?” HE replied, “no baby, that’s good and now you can sit down.” So I closed the blind, turned around, sat down and kept quiet to see what was going to happen next.
Then HE said, “do you have any idea why I asked you to look out the window and tell ME what you see?” I said, no. HE said, “you see baby, if you were on this bed dead right now MY world still continues.” I replied, “but I don’t care, for my heart has had enough from your people and why would YOU come to me today when I‘m coming to YOU today?” HE said, “to prevent you from carrying out this mission of yours and I even had MY birds sing to you for comforting until I arrived.” So, I smiled again. Then, I just sat back and looked at Him waiting to be disciplined for my behavior and HE gave me the worse discipline that HE could have ever given me.
Tears started falling down HIS face, then I started crying uncontrollably because I thought, I had made GOD cry. So I said, “I’m sorry, please forgive me, I didn’t mean to hurt you, please don’t cry.” Then He said, “baby, I thought you loved me.” I replied, “I do love YOU. I love YOU dearly and that’s why I’m going to kill myself so that I can be with you NOW, because I’m tired, I’m so tired.” Then HIS tears stopped and HE said, “how can you claim that you love ME, when you’re willing to give back the most precious gift that I gave you, which is, LIFE?” Then I replied, “what good is this kind of life? I’ve had the blues since I was two and I never asked to be born, so in turn, why must I be made to suffer? I’m not YOU and I should not have to put up with their mess nor should anyone. So I’m not willing to put up with the needless suffering caused by them anymore, so I don‘t care, I want to be with you.”
Then HE said, “but I care!” I asked, why? Why all of these needless trials and tribulations, that I’ve had to go through since the age of two, that has caused me to be the bluest person that I know, that makes no sense to me and that’s not love, to me. Then HE said, “it‘s not your time baby and, believe it or not I had your hand all the time. You had to go through what you did, in order to do the job that you were born to do for ME. Your job is, to soothe MY blues with love by soothing the blues of MY people.” I said, “how in the world am I suppose to do that?” HE told me to chill and said, “I told you I got you, baby, and I always have.” Then HE said, “how do you think I feel? I have billions of people and everyday since the beginning of time, no matter what I say or do, the majority of them constantly prove to ME, in one form or another by their actions and or by their words, that they don’t love ME.” Then I replied, “then do something about it! It’s YOUR World, TAKE IT! And if YOU choose to KILL everyone and start over again the way in which YOU intended it to be, than so be it!”
After that, we talked for what seemed like hours and HE gave me a total complete understanding of why things had to happen the way it did. Then, HE told me to put away the tools that I was going to use for my death and to lie down and close my eyes and HE’LL see me soon. I said okay and did what HE asked of me and then I fell asleep. What happened next, was the most beautiful thing that I could ever imagine. I was sitting in a big beautiful chair in HIS Heaven and I was draped in the finest of clothing and jewels and all I could do was smile because I was happy. Then, the song “And I love Her” by The Beatles started playing and this atmosphere was beyond any atmosphere that I’d ever felt before in my life and as I sat there enjoying the moment with my eyes closed, HE said, “may I have this dance?”
I opened my eyes and smiled because HE was there with arm extended to help me out of my chair and I was overwhelmed with the beauty for how romantic, was this moment in time. I took HIS hand, stood up, and said, “of course YOU can.” While we danced, HE sang to me the lyrics to the song, like HE did when HE first came to me when I was 10 years old but that song was called “Baby, Baby Don’t Cry” by Smokey Robinson and the Miracles. After our dance was over, HE informed me not to forget this time together and that HE was sending me back so I can get busy. But first, I’m to buy the karaoke version of our song and the money for it is already in my purse. So, whenever I want to remember this moment, just play it. I said okay, then HE brought me back, I purchased the CD and played our song everyday for years while I was busy taking care of what HE needed me to do until, our song didn’t have the same effect on me anymore and what happened next, is why the Campaign, that you’ll read about next week in part two, came to be.
Now in closing I say, yea. So until next week, you’ve been Up Close with Jeanie. Bye, bye, babies.
This article originally appeared in the Aug. 21 print edition.